Trailmates

So there I was standing outside of a popsicle shop in the Dominican Republic. 

I had just been on this amazing women's retreat with a good friend of mine. We decided to stay a few days longer. I was gonna stay about four days longer, and she was just staying an extra night. So it was the morning that we were taking her to the airport, and we were driving there and I was suggesting to her, strongly, that she should just stay longer with me. And she's like, no, I've got to get back to work. And she had different things going on back in Kansas City where we were living at the time. So I'm like, okay. So we head over to this popsicle shop on the way to the airport.

Alicia Newsome, DC, MS

While we're in the popsicle shop, she gets a text message that her flight is canceled. Not delayed, canceled. Just text message, your flight's been canceled. Call the airline to reschedule. So she walks outside to call a friend of hers and it's his birthday. And he was also picking her up from the airport. So she needs to let him know, all right, well, I'm not coming back today. I don't know when I'm coming back yet, but happy birthday and you don't need to pick me up in the airport. 

And when she was on the phone with him, she said, well, Dr. Alicia's here. You can talk to her about your stomach issues you've been having. So I come outside the popsicle shop and I'm standing there on FaceTime and he's sitting there telling me all about his stomach issues. And I'm just holding the phone up and asking questions and talking. 

And while I'm doing that, that is when my husband walked by.

So mind you, we're in the Dominican Republic. So everyone there is speaking Spanish. Whenever he sees women, they're all speaking Spanish. So he heard my voice speaking in English and he walks by and he says, “Hey Americans!” And, you know, then my friend starts walking with him and his friend. And they're walking and then she comes back and I don't even remember like seeing my husband. I just like feel like I just felt his presence. And normally if a guy, you know, hollers or says anything, I don't pay any attention to it. 

And my friend comes back and I'm like, okay, well what's going on? Like, did you get their number? And she's like, no, I told them that I feel so aligned that if we're supposed to run into each other again today, we will. And I'm like, what? And she's like, well, they said that there's music and drinks on the on the beach. So we finish up at the popsicle shop and we get us some food and then we head over to the beach.

We get over there, there's no music happening anywhere. And we're just walking around and she's looking, I'm looking. She's like, I don't see anybody anywhere. And I'm I just for some reason I'm like, they're out here somewhere. So I'm looking and I spot him and his friend. And then I happen to walk up to him, and then she walked up to his friend, and then we just sat there and we talked for hours.

So that that was like my first encounter with my husband, and that's when we met. But at the time, I'm living in Kansas City and he's living in Arizona at that time. So we've got this whole kind of dilemma, this amazing connection that we had with one another, but now we're long distance. 

The other very interesting thing about this story is just how much things in our lives will align for us. Like I believe that things are always working out for our good and always aligning. 

I had been in a relationship with someone else for a couple years. And at the time, I was also going through a course called Calling in ‘The One.’ And it was like 49 Days to Love Calling in the One. And in December of the previous year, I had gotten to day 49 and I didn't want to do it because it was… the activity was to like write out all the characteristics of the person that you want to be with when it comes to like how they, you know, make you laugh. It wasn't just like a regular like check off the list. It was very deep. It was very intuitive, like really into like how this person makes you feel, how this person handles finances, like all types of things, right? And I didn't do it because I knew that the guy that I was with at the time, it wasn't gonna line up with him. And he was a good guy, but I also wasn't ready to face that. So I didn't do it. 

January rolls around. And in that relationship, he made me upset about something. And that day I went home and I was like, I'm doing day 49. So I literally wrote it out. That was on January 20th. I wrote that out. And I wrote out everything and I was like, okay, God, you've got this. 

Ten days later, right before I was leaving for my trip for the Dominican Republic, my boyfriend comes, you know, he's like, Hey, can you come over? I need to talk to you. And I'm like, okay. So I head on over there and he's like, we have to break up. And he's crying. He's literally in tears telling me, we have to break up. I don't know why, but something's gonna happen while you're on this trip in the Dominican Republic and us being together is gonna hold you back.

And I was like, what? You know, and then I was like, well, I was kind of thinking, you know, our relationship was coming to a bit of an end here. But okay. And, you know, I felt sad. And then I let myself process all of that. And before I left for my trip, I actually went to Atlanta first to hang out with my godsister. And then we were we were like, Okay, we're good, you know. And then I went on the women's retreat. That was a whole healing experience. And then fast forward, you know, basically a week later, and I'm meeting my husband outside of a popsicle shop. 

So I meet him. All of these things have aligned for like both of us to meet each other that day in the Dominican Republic. And now we're long distance. And he's in Arizona. I'm in Kansas City. What are we gonna do? On top of that, my husband's love language is quality time. So long distance does not work very well for that. 

So we ended up, you know, I came to Arizona. He took me to Sedona, like just amazing time, the incredible connection with one another. But we hit this point where my husband was like, I don't know how this is gonna work and I don't want to like break your heart or, you know, anything like that. He was just very honest, like, I can't do long distance. I've tried it before, all of these things.

At this point in my career, I am in pharmaceutical research and I fly around the country every single week, I'm in a different city, at a different site, doing work. You know, when my husband had told me, you know, it's not gonna work, we really just like stopped talking. Like that was it. I was so heartbroken. Like I was, I was so heartbroken. I was doing this course and it was like another woman empowerment thing and I would fly to New York for the course and I had told the women there like that I met this man, like he is it. And then like the next time they saw me, they were like, You just seem so sad. And I was sad. I was very sad. But I was like, you know, there's nothing, you know, I can't like make him like realize, you know, we can make this work. 

I ended up one night while I was there in New York. We were walking and it was like a full moon and my friend was like, Look at how beautiful the moon was. And I just stopped and I just prayed. And I was like, if it is in Your will for, you know, me to be with this man, let things align. 

The next day, I get a call from the company that I have a contract with. And they say, Well, we need you to start going to this site in Arizona every three weeks. Can you do it? And I'm like, Yes, absolutely. I can do that. And I let him know like that had happened. He was still like a little hesitant. And, you know, when I flew into Arizona, he actually ended up canceling a trip that he had. Because he wasn't supposed to be there that first weekend when I went. He had some continuing ed to do in New York. And I had told him, Well, I'm gonna be in Arizona on these dates, but I know you have that conference in New York. And then he had text me back, he's like, I'm not going to that anymore. And then he was like, But you know, I look forward to seeing you when you come, right? 

So I came and he just opened the door to his house, and we just sat there and we talked for hours and hours and hours. 

And that evening, we just decided, Okay, well, let's go ahead and do this and we'll just take it one day at a time. So that's what we did. We literally took it one day at a time until the following year he came to Kansas City to see me. And I have two kids from a previous marriage and that was the first time he was meeting them as well and he was like, Well, I want to get married and you know, what do you think? And I'm like, let's do it. 

So we went to Vegas and we got married and here we are many years later.